Unsubstantiated & Uninformed Predictions: Logan

Its time for another entry in our series of Unsubstantiated & Uninformed Predictions featuring Logan, a movie that I am extremely excited to see yet still I’m a tad bit skeptical of its potential given the last two Wolverine movies. Logan is the third and last Wolverine movie starring Hugh “Miserables” Jackman, and it has some large shoes to fill.

As I said before its the third Wolverine movie, and the first two were just horrible, like really horrible, like “guys I went back and watched Eric Banana’s Hulk and I guess its not so bad” horrible. But Hugh “Well at least I didn’t accidentally saw my wife in half” Jackman always does a great job playing the iconic immortal badass. Its also like the dozenth (or so) X-Men movie, so I think it goes without saying that this movie needs to be dope as heck, and it better fucking be because apparently its supposed to be Rated R so that possibility could be a game changer. Check out the recently released trailer…

That’s a pretty amazing trailer. I’ve never read the “Old Logan” comics and I don’t know if the plot of this movie will follow any plot lines from those comics, but I think the trailer looks awesome and it looks like it could be the send off Hugh “I really hope Jake Gyllenhaal finds me in this hole” Jackman deserves as Wolverine. I mean the guy’s been playing Wolverine damn near perfectly for over fifteen years. It’ll be sad to see him go but hopefully this movie will leave X-Men fans like me and you (but Last Stand sucks don’t defend it) with a sweet sweet taste in our nerdy mouths. So here are my Unsubstantiated & Uninformed Predictions for Logan!

1. According to the plot description the movie takes place in the future, but some future where most mutants are gone, but clearly not too far into the future since Prof. X is still hanging around sans shaving cream. I’m gonna go ahead and say this will take place in some sort of an alternate time line.

2. Love seeing Murphy from Narcos and with a robot hand?! Intriguing… I’m predicting he will be voiced by Kiefer Sutherland (inside joke).

3. We will see Prof. X die (again)!

4. At some point Wolverine will be fixing a car, truck, or some type of vehicle, probably holding a wrench.

5. Doubling down on the little kid handing him a wrench or holding a flashlight while Wolverine fixes this vehicle.

6. Logan will have 1-3 Jean Grey flashbacks/dreams.

7. Wolverine will break out in song.

8. At some point Logan and Charles will be reminiscing at night probably by campfire while the kid is asleep and it’ll be a story about Magneto.

9. Will.I.Am will not make an appearance.

10. So it appears that this kid is a clone of Wolverine (X-23 to be exact) so she has healing powers, so I’m predicting she will be obliterated or disappear in some crazy wreck/explosion and we’ll think she’s dead but she totally won’t be.

11. Xavier is supposed to be suffering from alzheimer’s so I think he will become confused and at some point he’ll think he is back at the mansion hanging out with Magneto in the old days.

12. The water tower thing that we see Prof. X hanging out in is acting as a DIY cerebro.

13. Logan will say “bub” 2-4 times.

14. At some point Logan is clearly going to have to fight this X-23 kid due to hypnotization and/or whatever Bill Cosby keeps in his medicine cabinet.

15. This movie will not talk about or address anything from the first two Wolverine movies.

16. Wolverine’s claws will break or be broken.

17. Xavier will sacrifice himself somehow.

18. Wolverine will slice the barrels off of over a dozen rifles or machine guns with his claws.

19. Murphy is obviously going to be a badass and Wolverine will obviously take him out by riding a motorcycle into his helicopter.

20. This movie is going to be the best Wolverine movie yet and it will be awesome! I basically predicted the same thing for Suicide Squad and we all know how that turned out… Let’s hope Logan is nothing like Suicide Squad. Not that it would be.

Those are my Unsubstantiated & Uninformed Predictions for Logan, the final movie that will feature Hugh “John Travolta get that gun out of my face while I’m typing” Jackman as Wolverine. I’m certainly going to miss him, I still remember seeing the very first X-Men movie in theaters so his portrayal as Wolverine will always have a special place in my heart.

Look forward to seeing Logan in early 2017, let us know what you think about the Wolverine or X-Men movies, and thanks for reading.

Photo Credit: Snagged from screenrant.com


X-men: Apocalypse Blu-ray

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